In our “hurry up” world to run errands, attend meetings, and get home, we often disregard other drivers and cars when deciding where and how to park. Here are eight of my biggest pet peeves on parking etiquette:
1. Park straight in a parking space. In a parking lot or garage where cars are parked in slots, leave room on each side so you can open your doors without hitting the cars beside you. Park in the middle of a marked parking space. Overhanging the stripes will crowd the driver who parks next to you will inevitably lead to door dings in the paint. If you’re parking on the street, leave room so you and the other cars can exit without bumping.
2. Don’t straddle a line and take up two spaces in a parking lot or garage. Some people with new cars or those who don’t want to risk having their car’s sides banged by adjacent car doors will park in the middle of two spaces. This is not only rude; it also makes it impossible for others to park at all. Crowded garages and lots need every space.
3. Don’t take up two spaces on the street. In residential areas where the parking spaces are limited and not marked, always park as close to the end of an open space as you can. Often there is room for two cars between driveways. If you park in the middle you make it impossible for another car to park in that space. Even if there is not room for two full-size cars, there may be room for a mini car or a motorcycle. Be considerate.
4. Take your turn when waiting for a parking place. In a crowded parking garage or lot, when you see someone pulling out of a space, get as close as you can and turn on your turn signal to let other drivers know you have “dibs” on the space. If another car is close to the space and has its turn signal on already, you lose! The other car gets the space.
If you and another driver both think you found the space first, be generous and let it go. A parking space is not worth a fight. Another spot will be vacant soon.
5. Make your intentions clear when walking in a parking lot. If you’re walking back to your car and you sense a car crawling down the aisle behind you, don’t presume they’re sightseeing. They want your parking space!
If you’re just dropping off your shopping bags and heading back into the mall for lunch, make eye contact and tell the other driver your intentions. If you’re not leaving, shake your head, or say, “I’m not leaving.” I once followed a woman to her car, and watched her put her packages in the trunk and walk away. She knew I was following her and waiting and never said a word.
If you are leaving, make eye contact, then nod and point toward your car. If your car is clear across the lot, communicate this to the other driver by pointing or telling them. Walk directly toward your car. Don’t meander. It’s aggravating to follow a shopper, only to watch her cut across to a different aisle, pull out and let somebody else grab the spot before you can get there.
6. Make sure your car is pulled into the space far enough, but not too far. If you have a normal-size car, pull your vehicle all the way into the space so the rear of your car is in line with other cars. This makes it easier for other drivers to see past your car when they are backing out of adjacent spaces, and also gives the widest possible driving lane between rows. Pulling in properly is particularly helpful when shoppers pushing loaded carts are sharing the driving lane with moving vehicles.
If you have a small compact or sub-compact vehicle, such as a Mini Cooper or Smart car, do NOT pull all the way into the space. Park so that the back end of your car is in line with the cars beside you. This lets drivers know that the space is occupied and does not give the false impression that the parking spot is vacant.
7. Never force your car into a space that’s too small. It bums me out whenever I see a giant SUV parked in a “compact only” space. Standard parking spaces are generally 9 feet wide while compact car spaces are only 7 feet wide and shorter. Obviously, a large SUV or pickup—and especially a Hummer—will not fit easily in a compact car space. Quite simply put, they are not supposed to fit.
8. Watch for pedestrian crosswalks in parking lots. Crosswalks are common near the main entrances and exits of most large garages and lots. Created for the safety of pedestrians coming from and returning to their cars, they are usually marked with diagonal white or yellow stripes and often marked with a pedestrian crossing or stop sign. As much as you are in a hurry to find a spot, slow down. Watch for pedestrians and obey all signs in the parking lot. I’ve witnessed near hits by cars driving too fast and not seeing the pedestrian.
Finally, don’t expect miracles. Even if you are already driving this way, or decide to adopt these courteous practices, don’t expect others to do the same. Be careful of letting your expectations for others’ behavior contribute to your own potential parking lot rage. Take a few deep breaths, and take your time.
Blog Question of the month: Do you agree or disagree with these observations? What pet peeves do you have about car parking we can add to this list. Let us hear from you in the space below.
Happy Practicing!
You forgot to add those drivers that block people’s driveways, park up on sidewalks and obstruct wheelchair ramps.
Also something needs to be shouted about the lack of common courtesy of the city’s bicyclist.
Dear Pattie: Thanks for the add. Admittedly there are no doubt many more items that could be added to the list. I simply chose my top 8 pet peeves.
What common courtesy for bicylists? They're the ones that need common courtesy. They think they own the road when they do not, and they get mad when a car passes them. They can't go 50 mph on a road when that is the speed limit, so they should be on the side of the road, not in the middle.
I have always wondered the best way to handle the situation when you ARE leaving your parking space and someone wants your spot but you have to unload an entire cart and then strap in two babies which takes at least five minutes. Do you tell them you are not leaving so they will move on and not pressure you? Or do you nod that you are leaving and then torture by making them wait a long time?
Dear Kathleen: I understand your situation. It is not a good idea to signal you are not leaving because a) it’s not true; b) what if he sees you leaving in five minutes. The best is to simply acknowledge them and tell them you will be five minutes. It’s up to them to wait for your space, or not. Afterall, “a bird in hand is worth two in the bush” so five minutes may not be too bad.
I don’t think one should “wait” for a space. I live in Capitola, CA and many times people will see a car not quite ready to leave and will wait for that spot that holds everybody else up and that could wrap traffic around the block and make a real nightmare.
My advice, especially around Christmas time, if there is a car in the space, guess what that space is not empty, move on and find an empty space. Contrary to what Syndi is saying; don’t stalk somebody around the parking lot to find a person walking to their car, it makes people anxious and rushed and this could be dangerous to all. They might have small children that they loose track because they are hurrying to get out the space for the other person to park.
We can’t be responsible for the other person getting a parking space. We need to worry about ourselves and stay safe.
Dear Susan: Thanks for writing. There are exceptions to all rules, depending on the environment. Holding up traffic selfishly is not appropriate, nor is stalking. Yet, it all boils down to… “It’s not what you do, but how you do it” that counts. There are appropriate and inappropriate ways to look for and wait for parking spaces when done with civility and courtesy to others in mind. Keep the comments comin’!
Is it against the law, when exiting a parking spot in a public parking lot, to drive forward across or through unoccupied parking spots, rather than backing out of the spot the way you entered?
Thank you.
Barbara: Thanks for the question; however, legal matters are not my expertise. My thinking on this matter is whether it was/is/will be “safe” for you to do it, versus being an issue of being “against the law.”
As Judith Martin (Miss Manners) says, “Laws are created when etiquette fails.” All I will say is I’ve done exactly what you said for right or wrong, so please let me know if you find the practice to be illegal so I won’t ever get a ticket.
Today I was backing out of a space. I was about halfway out, and a van came down the aisle and passed behind me without slowing down. I darn near hit him. Shouldn’t drivers wait if they see you are pulling out, even if they don’t want your spot? Who has the right of way?
Carol: I know how frustrating various driving situations can be. To my thinking I don’t think either has the “right of way.” Both should be cautious of the other. The best advice—knowing there are lots of crazy drivers out there—is for you to always take the lead in being cautious of every move taken; and in so doing you will not be as shocked when situations take place. All the best…
I was wondering what the “etiquette” would be if vehicles owned by a company are parking in spaces close to the entrance of said company making clients park further away? I know when I have driven to companies where all their company vehicles are taking up parks and I have to drive around or further away, puts me off going there. Potentially driving away business. What are your thoughts? Is there some kind of survey out there that has some statistics on this do you know?
Thank you.
Iris: I agree with you that staff members, regardless of having a company car or not, should not be parking in the closest spaces on a regular basis and if you are a company that has lots of visitors, closest slots should be reserved for the disabled and guests. There is one exception I’ve seen in companies is to have one slot that is reserved for monthly staff award winners, which is a nice reward for something. Perhaps mark specific spaces for visitors and staff members in an arrangement that is fair to all. Good luck!
I have two ladies that do not live in our building, but work here as caregivers. One is for the day shift, then the other comes at night and after the day lady gets out of the spot the other one parks in it. The problem is that the day lady and the night lady chat every night blocking others parking spots and make it hard to get in. If they do happen to move, it is rarely ever enough for me to get into my spot without a hassle. I have complained, but they think it is cute to do this, and know the HOA here will never really do anything to solve the problem. So I am forced to park outside in order to stay out of prison.
I liked that you mentioned that when parking it's important to avoid parking in two spaces because it's rude. I would imagine that when parking you want to be careful of las and guidelines to avoid an accident or getting towed. I bet you would want to make sure you are parked legally to avoid being towed.
Eve: Yes, a car that takes up two spaces when parking is one of my biggest pet peeves when in a crowded parking lot. When I do it, I get back in the car to adjust my parking. Others, obviously, are too lazy to do it, to my regret, and this is where it becomes rude and inconsiderate to other fellow parkers. What goes around comes around, they say? I want all the help I can get to be on the receiving end in a future situation. Who knows, it may have already happened and I don’t know it. Happy Practicing!
When parking lot spaces aren't clearly marked, drivers are more likely to park farther from each other to avoid dinging their car doors. Clearly marked parking spaces are important because they show drivers how much room they have to park.
Hello Lind Marking: Yes! I agree. What bothers me is when parking spaces are clearly marked and the driver of their cars don’t park them appropriately, specifically taking up two spaces or encroaching on the next space. We must take care to “take the time” to repark our cars, so others may park in good order… Do I dare say, Don’t be lazy and selfish in allowing yourself to be a parking space hog. What goes around comes around. Happy Practicing!
I loved it when you said that don’t straddle a line and take up two spaces in a parking lot or garage. We are planning to put a driveway along our lawn going to the patio. I think an asphalt driveway would be great. I will be contacting paving contractors soon.
I want to make sure that my car park can be used nicely. It makes sense that having proper lines marked in it would be important! I can see how that would make it easier to know where to park.
I’m having this recurring problem with my neighbors where I’ll be 1/3 of the way out of the parking garage (for context I’m in the very first spot, and because of what has become the “motorcycle parking lot”, which used to be the no parking zone directly across from my spot, what used to be a 3 point turn for my to get out of has now become a 3-to-5 point turn, depending on whether or not the car next to me is home. And I drive a manual transmission, so that adds another layer. There is one man who, when waiting to turn into the driveway, once he sees it’s me pulling out, will make a special effort to hurry into the driveway and try to force me to back back into my spot. I involved the police last time. Today I had the exact same issue with someone else, but when I continued going forward she got scared and went back into the street to wait her turn. Does anyone happen to know the etiquette for this kind of situation?
Hello Erin: No matter the issues involving parking or otherwise, I believe in speaking directly with the person involved in any conflict, not through email, text, or the police. Instead, use the Sandwich Technique as a framework for the conversation you hold. Say something cordial to ease into the topic; then share your concerns from your own point of view, never accusing or saying anything about “you” do this or that. Ask questions to confirm understanding, such as is there a reason it appears to me that … this or that? Then remain silent to hear the answer. Remain calm and do not contradict what may be shared by the person. From the information
suggest positive action steps to remedy the situation and perception you have. Get agreement and ask for their suggestions. End with a positive sentiment of a sincere desire to live amicably together. Invite the person to please share any concerns they may have of you. Be willing to listen and always stay on the side of being positive, never negative, with all the words and thoughts shared. If you want more direct ideas on this specific situation, please email me at Info@AdvancedEtiquette.com for me to understand more specifics. Public posts never share the uniqueness of each situation to know what’s best to do. Thank you!